THE STAIRSTEPS TO EFFECTIVENESS AND LOVING LIFE
JUST "STEP UP" - IT IS YOUR CHOICE AND IT IS WITHIN YOUR ABILITY



WE ALL HAVE THE NECESSARY ABILITIES - AND THIS IS WHY AND HOW

We ("everyone") are given the ability to step up the stairs of effectiveness and loving life.  We are not "given" the ability to invent the lightbulb or being a great leader - but those who did that also did not start off with that magical gift, they weren't "given" it - they created it.  

Just as you can.

The fact of life is that we must progress gradually, not "just add a little water and voila instant success" (or enlightenment, riches, happiness, etc.).  We progress linearly, on a line.  Yes, occassionally we will have an "aha!" that frees us up from something or inspires us to jump, so we seem to go to a higher line all of a sudden.  But the truth is that is just a sudden realization of the things we've been learning all of a sudden coming together because of an added ingredient of information or understanding on how to integrate it all or use it effectively. 

Anyway, in a sense, there are no miracles (unexplainable happenings) as the law of cause and effect is still valid, but there are seeming miracles, where we just don't know yet how they occurred.

So, this is how life occurs:

The "Knowing" Levels:   

           0                           50                     51                  51-99               "100%"
         Born                     Childhood                                 Adulthood                      

  With all the abilities       Early learning          Repair &                                  Possible
to learn and implement    some bad data,       Recovery
  what it takes to live      low reasoning
    a good life)   
(Whole And Complete)

Since the objective of life is happiness, the "100%" that I use relates not to "knowing everything" but to knowing "enough" to live a very happy, very effective life - this is a point we can all get to - and I mean ALL of us! 

Some people learn more of what works as a child either by chance such as having caregivers who taught you well (but none perfectly!) and fortunate circumstances or by "deduction" where we made conclusions based on observations of what worked or didn't work. 

Much of what we learned as children was either erronous or misinterpreted and misunderstood - and not workable for getting the results we want in life.  Therefore, there is some correction needed and often some "repair", by which I mean correcting what we are holding onto as having hurt us in some way (regrets, bad parenting, inferiority feelings, etc.). 

Another way of looking at "knowing" levels, that is essentially the same, is that they are levels of mastery (rising from incompetence and/or ignorance to basic knowing and then up to effective knowing and then up to understanding so fully that one is able to implement what it takes to create the realistics, meaningful results one wants.   My odd qualifiers before results is meant to caution people from expecting unrealistic results that we're not really capable of doing (from flying by flapping our arms or becoming perfectly powerful to overcome all natural forces...or whatever).  By "meaningful", I mean that we have enough time to get results that comprise all of what is of the highest and truest value to us.   We can't have everything we want, but we can have everything we really, really want - and that is more than enough.  Obviously, at the extreme, you can't have everything in the world, but you absolutely can have all of what it takes to be happy in life

Before we go to the next section, a brief word on Repair And Recovery. 

It would be obvious is we were driving a car with flat tires or oblong tires or had no oil in the engine.  But, for some reason, alot of equivalent-problem-level "wrong" beliefs and practices are ignored, denied, or left unclear and uncorrected. 

Unfortunately, you cannot go fast down the highway without having round inflated tires.  The irony is that some people expect to.  Those people are taking motivational courses, how to get rich quick courses, and how to go fast course - but they forget that they cannot go fast with all the self-barriers and self-obstacles.  So they either criticize themselves for not being able to go fast (not realizing why, but holding it as a character weakness or a reflection of self worth) and/or they just feel bad about failing so often.  In fact, there is nothing wrong with them at the base level, they just haven't added the necessary knowing that it takes to succeed at the higher levels.  No fault, no blame, no criticism. 

but if you continue to live in the fault, blame, criticism syndrome, you will be constantly stimulating bad chemicals, bad feelings, lower brain functions (automatically occurs in fear and anger), and low psychological energy.  Living in that syndrome is the equivalent of trying to drive a perfectly good car but with flat tires.  You can tune the engine all you want and be super-knowledgeable but you still can't go as fast with flat tires!   So, solve the flat tire problem before you move on.

You must, no matter how high a level you are at, go through the Repair and Recovery necessary to have a well operating "vehicle" for achieving your life happiness.  Some need less recovery (correction) and/or repair, so they might wish to ignore this or think they can skip over it (perhaps with arrogance?) because they are already confident and strong - but I contend that there is nobody who doesn't have something to repair and recover from, such that the process would not benefit them. 


THE MASTERY LEVELS - CLIMBING THE STAIRS 

We all have some levels of mastery, even if acquired by accident or randomly - enough so we can get by at certain levels.  But few have developed it on purpose, deliberately, and well.

The Level of Mastery

It is up to you to choose the level of mastery of life: 

Mark where you choose to be (use a "C").  Decide if you are willing to do what it takes to learn to get to that level.  Mark where you are willing to get to, using a "W".  If you choose, you can mark where you are now, using a "H" for "here is where I am".

   |_____________________________________________________________________|       
   0                                                                                                            100

Helpless   Believe            Growing effectiveness -->                                        Happiness
            helpless,           Lessening victimness -->                                           Mastery
             victim

Learning what is "enough", driving out of alignment/oil, etc.


Visualize each level as stair steps in a sense, with the important idea being that you cannot be at the higher level until you've taken the steps to get there.  (Believe it or not, most people do not fully realize this concept, so they get unduly frustrated and feel like they are "not enough".)

MASTERY         
  LEVEL                            EFFECTIVENESS/COMPETENCE/RESULTS           

Ignorance     

Discovery        Ineffective, more mistakes (Such as in learning to walk)

                    Conscious incompetence 

Strengthen,     Still feel scarcity, fear of failure, but build a solid foundation for life; have a
Build                 sense of progress
 
                    Sense of "enoughness" (Fears dissipate, gradually. Stress drops dramatically.)

Success          Conscious competence, reliable results - Pretty well know you'll handle
                      things usually correctly or can learn

Abundance      Unconscious competence, life seems effortless - You are so competent at this,
                      that life overflows, with more opportunities coming to you than you have time
                      for, learn to steer effectively

Higher             You are ready and able to help others
Discernment

High                You leave something of lasting value, contribution to people. 
Contribution

Your happiness is substantially achieved when you achieve a sense of "enoughness" and of a solid enough foundation to live life upon.  The "polishing" off the process for being able to live a very happy life largely occurs in the "success" stage, but the feelings of happiness continue to expand far beyond what you could have conceived, as you go into the "abundance" stage. 

See the linked pieces related to How Much Is Enough?




The Life Book Table Of Contents/Links - Use this to read "chapter by chapter"

The Ways To Mastery  



The Stages Of Development - Knowing This Makes All The Difference - We learn, per Erickson, in these stages at these ages certain lessons - either well or incorrectly.

Authentic Learning - True, effective learning is a matter of using expert resources in a systematic manner such that your knowledge is "completed" and usable (and used) to live a better life!