THE GAME OF LIFE
HOW TO WIN OR LOSE
THE GAME OF LIFE
(AND HOW TO WIN OR LOSE)
WHY?
(PURPOSE)
MEASURES, HOW TO TELL IF "WINNING" RULES OF PLAY
STRATEGIES OBSTACLES
CONSEQUENCES
ROLE (POSITION)
ONE PLAYS
COMMITMENT/STANDARDS
TEAMMATES
Aligned SKILLS, KNOWLEDGE
Supportive
Skilled
COACH(ES)
COMPONENTS OF
ANY GAME
PERSONS <-- OBSTACLES
TO PLAY --> ENERGY --> STRATEGIES --> RESULTS
(including you, --> SUPPORT DESIRED
Being, Skills) --> LEARNING/TRAINING
THESE ARE THE COMPONENTS OF THE GAME OF LIFE
CONTENTS
There is some way of scoring
There is a field, with boundaries
There are rules
There are skills and good practices
Attitudes and ways of being
Decisions, problem solving, obstacles
Learning and practicing
Related resources and reading
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HOW TO WIN OR LOSE THE GAME
Life is a game, as are all the subparts (subgames). All of the above components make up the game. (Note that we can choose to play the wrong games, and many times
"Unwinnable Games". Determining which games to play is a key to living the truly good life. And you will want to determine "how much there is to lose" and the "penalties" of losing - for answering this question correctly will allow one to be freed up to truly "play" in the game, free of fear and barriers.)
THERE IS SOME WAY OF SCORING AND KEEPING SCORE
A game, to be a game, must have some "goals" or measures of how well one is doing so one knows if one is winning. Thus we "keep score."
If a person didn't know what he/she wanted in life, how well would the person do in the game?
Wouldn't the person just try to "get by" and maybe even delude him/herself into thinking that things are pretty much ok - and believing that until he/she realized how life was actually going?
In football, if you didn't know that one was to make more points than the other team, how would the players do at the game - and how would they feel if they cavorted on the field and then later learned what it was supposed to be about? (In life, people look back and then they realize they "shoulda done better".)
And if you didn't keep score, then how would you know whether you needed to do better or learn more? (Oh, I'm doing just fine. I'm just living life.)
THERE IS A FIELD, WITH BOUNDARIES
Of course, every game has a field to play on, with boundaries outside of which the points didn't count. In life, when we cross the boundaries, life doesn't count. In the relationship game there are certain boundaries we don't cross. In the health game, if we go outside the boundaries of what is healthy, we suffer the consequences, even if we didn't know better. In each case, in order not to violate the boundaries, we have to know where they are!
Most people have not spent the necessary time clearly determining what the purpose of the game is, what it takes to win, how to keep score to see how they are doing, nor where the boundaries are - yet they are playing the game, and, except by accident, not doing nearly as well in the game as is easily achievable.
THERE ARE RULES
And knowing the rules of play might be a good idea. Like the laws of physics, such as violating the law of gravity - and reaping the penalty. We smoke, overeat, stress ourselves, drug ourselves, drink alcohol - yet we stay relatively oblivious of the known effects!
But even worse, we believe in strategies of play that don't work!!!!! We believe that getting certain things in life or achieving certain objectives in life will make us happy - yet we find that they don't do that, at least not for long. We don't bother to learn and practice those skills that are the basics of getting down the field to make a score. (See What Makes Us Happy and What Doesn't, in the Happiness section. See What Works and Doesn't Work In Relationships, in the Relationships sections. Or the Health section.)
THERE ARE SKILLS AND GOOD PRACTICES
Interestingly enough, we are granted the most incredible body and computer system ever in the universe, but we allow others, including the culture, to program them and then we don't bother to learn how to operate them optimally to live and appreciate a happier life at a higher and higher level as life goes on!!!!!!!!!!
We learn some skills to play some of the subgames, especially the ones where the scores are more apparent (or seem, on the surface, to be).
We are incentivized to learn more social skills, as we get feedback from others and try to be popular enough. We get good at the skills needed to make money in our jobs and often let that game overwhelm the life game, at a great but unnecessary costs. Yet we don't learn the bigger skills that get the ball down the field consistently in life, with peace of mind, contentment, fulfillment and happiness.
We work hard in order to "have" certain things because we think their possession will help make us be happier, yet that soon fades, plus we often make ourselves miserable or less happy in the hope that the future will be better. Our "work" is the "doing" in order to get us the "having". Yet we often overlook learning better ways to get a better amount per amount of effort. Although we realize that football players (and other sports figures) need to practice, practice, practice and practice what is right and what works, we don't apply that same obvious reasoning to ourselves. If the athletes have to do those things to be successful, we certainly would logically have to do the same.
ATTITUDES AND WAYS OF BEING
And we admire the "way of being", who the athletes have become as people, yet we fail to apply that to ourselves. Few of us spend more than a sporadic, occasional burst of effort to create the fantastic attitude that the great players of sports have. Few of us spend the time and seek the coaching to be focused and to "be" really good players in the game of life. (Look at the indicators and you can see how well we are doing in the "being" area.)
Even those who have pushed through to win in some of the subgames still provide us with excuses that we buy into. Even people we respect might say such things as "It's too much effort to follow a discipline" or "it's too hard" - while it's actually fairly easy if one builds slowly, while following the principles.
An example is for people to say it's normal to drink socially to "loosen up" or to overeat or to compomise our standards. It's normal to get angry or to blame or to complain or to gossip - all "toxic" behaviors that are avoidable with knowledge and wisdom.
DECISIONS, PROBLEM SOLVING, OBSTACLES
Of course, a quarterback or a full back have to make good decisions that are clear and then commit to them, quickly! Yet we spend little time becoming experts at that - learning the basic skills of good decision-making, including problem solving.
In every game there are obstacles to overcome, not the least of which are the opposite team. Knowing how to overcome the obstacles would seem to be a worthy goal. And learning what the obstacles are in the first place helps us know what skills to develop to overcome them. And certainly a football player who felt like a victim of the obstacles or of the rules or of the opposition members would not do well - but there are victims of obstacles or adverse consequences in life, who "succeed" in some areas but numb themselves in certain ways in other areas...
LEARNING AND PRACTICING
If we are to win the game of life, we must first learn how to be happy and effective in life. And that is what we are seeking to do in this Life Management site in order to get to the point of the whole game - get the greatest amount of enduring, substantial happiness in our lives, plus helping others whom we care about to do the same.
We are asking you to choose to be committed to learning what it takes and then following the very "doable" steps (without any mystical or magical or illogical, impractical "solutions") that will take you to that point, with great health in our bodies, in our thinking, in our peace of mind and with the greatest happiness.
What do you choose?
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Again, we duplicate (below) the "Components of Any Game", where we seek to add more power to those things that propel us toward the result and eliminate/handle those that go the opposite direction (obstacles), using great strategies, aimed at an objective we are absolutely clear about. The process to do so is, quite basically and logically, is to do Planning, to decide where we want to go, see where we are now, and decide what we're willing to do to close the gap, but enjoy the journey along the way.
So, next, you would go now to the Planning page, to begin the overall plan. Though it could be argued that you should go through the process of learning life first, we believe it is best to do a plan to see what you want, so that when you read you have more of an objective and a perspective in mind.
See, after the diagram, possible resources and reading.
RELATED RESOURCES AND READING
If Life Is A Game, These Are The Rules, Cherie Carter-Scott.
Clearing up what is wanted:
Unlimited Power, Tony Robbins - See in this book how you must be clear on what you want and the whys.
Date With Destiny workshop, Tony Robbins - Expensive, but it finishes off with clarity
COMPONENTS OF
ANY GAME
PERSONS <-- OBSTACLES
TO PLAY --> ENERGY --> STRATEGIES --> RESULTS
(including you, --> SUPPORT DESIRED
Being, Skills) --> LEARNING/TRAINING
THESE ARE THE COMPONENTS OF THE GAME OF LIFE
HAVE A COACH?
How well would a player do without a coach? Even Tiger Woods had a coach!
LEARN BY GUESSING?
How would a player do if he just looked at everybody playing and guessed about what was going on? Or if the player asked people in the audience how to play well and then took their advice?
Well, people live their lives that way, imputing what life is about and learning from non-experts.
Will you?
"Life is 99% just a game, but we forget this. Understand this and you will let go of the worries and fears, and you'll just get to 'play' in the game of life."
The BuddhaKahuna
DIAGRAMS: The diagrams are first, for an overview and a quick reference reminder before reading the discussion below. Look at them, use them to refer to for perspective, and then read the discussion that follows.
