HOW CAN I BE RESPONSIBLE
IF IT IS OUTSIDE OF MY CONTROL
Being responsible is "acting in a manner corresponding to what is needed to effect a solution or good result."
It is not at all about "fault" - that is just a cultural addition. Though one is responsible for having produced any result caused by one's response - it is strictly a recognition of the cause and the effect of the cause. (See Cause And Effect And Power.)
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UNCONFUSING THE DEFINITION
People get so confused about this concept. That is because we have thrown so much cultural "stuff" (beliefs) into the definition so that it becomes murky and confusing.
Let's clarify all of this.
The pure definition, before adding in lots of other items, is
Able to choose a response
The view of being the cause of one's life and actions.
Derivation, original pure meaning, before cultural modification:
French "corresponding to"
Latin past participle of respond
(Therefore, it is responding in a way corresponding to what is needed in the situation!)
Respond is to:
To act in return or in answer
Therefore, being responsible is acting in a manner corresponding to what is needed to effect a solution or good result.
What has been thrown in:
Fault (if one is responsible for what one does, then one must be accountable for it, which may be true, but it is not responsibility in itself
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YOU CANNOT CAUSE IT ALL, BUT YOU CAN ALWAYS BE RESPONSIBLE
Yes, you do not cause or control the weather, a safe falling on you, other people, nor many outcomes in life, you are still responsible for being in the way, in the circumstance, for being with those people. It is not your fault, but you did choose such actions that you were where you were at at the time.
But if you are responsible, then you put on a raincoat when it rains - and you don't cuss out the weather - or other people or circumstances of any sort. You just do whatever is next. You simply choose. You don't wait for anybody to rescue you, you do what you can - even if you are not all powerful, you do what is appropriate, what corresponds to what you believe will work.
RESPONSIBILITY TO GET TO WHERE YOU CAN BE RESPONSIBLE
And you are responsible for learning about what works in life and the knowledge to make it work. You, of course, appreciate what there is in existence that positively benefits you - and then you add whatever you can.
You learn more of what is true of the consequences of what you do and what the world does, so that you can better be able to assess what is an appropriate and useful action to do. Toward this end, you accept all situations as they are (not irresponsibly doing a victim of circumstances act or any dependency flounder) and then you will have developed your confidence such that you know that you will recover from any "bad" outcome and that you will, virtually for sure, be able to enhance the situation to make yourself happier and to be happy in life. And the result of being at this level of responsibility is that you attain fearlessness - and, I assure you, it is attainable and not some mysterious unattainable heroic condition for the rare individual. See Fearlessness.
AN EXAMPLE
In EST (Erhard Seminar Training), one of the concepts that perhaps was not "gotten" by all was that one is responible in the case of somebody else's mistake:
If a car runs a stop sign and runs into me, I am responsible in the matter. The mistake, of course, was made by the driver of the other car, or it wouldn't have happened. However, I was the cause, by my choice, for my part in the matter. I was the one who caused myself to be in that spot so that I could be run into. No fault of mine, but a result that I am responsible for - I am the cause of being there at that time.
