CREATE A COMPELLING, BEAUTIFUL FUTURE
BEING DRAWN TO A WONDERFUL FUTURE
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A LIFE SUCKED UP BY...OR...
Life can be sucked up by present concerns and focus on "what's wrong". It can be a closing in, to no possibilities...and cynicism or resignation. It can be a life where we hold a weakness as if it is a fault, instead of a missing (see Weaknesses, Flaws, And Faults). And a life where we consider ourselves or part of ourselves as flawed and needing to be fixed.
Or we can create a beautiful, compelling future - one that is attractive, drawing you willingly and 'magnetically' toward it.
Whether you get to that exact future or not, just having a direction to head into will give a path to go forward on - one where you get to create something new, created in order to get down that path. This choice is the opposite of living a closed life, something equivalent to "entropy" in life, where nothing expands and all the energy goes into seemingly fixed (permanent) problems and areas, losing the energy so it cannot be used for more useful purposes.
Although entropy is a phenomenon in physics, it also relates metaphorically to life. And the worst effect of entropy is "imploding" from the mass of energy held in and compressed into a small space, with no openings and little new. See how this relates to life by reading Entropy .
A TAUTOLOGY (A truism in the form of equaling something, always)
No future created ahead of time = nothing to live into, a life of randomness and wandering around going nowhere. (Duh!)
To live a truly great life, first you must create it on paper, clearly and powerfully.
And then the rest is simply doing it, as you'll have so much energy and forward motion that it will be inevitable.
If you create no possible future, the only alternative is to use the past as the future. That is not good, that is not what we want.
BUT, ISN'T THERE RISK TO THE NEW?
But isn't there a risk involved in not doing those things that I already know how to do? Shouldn't I just hold on to my past?
A risk is defined as the chance of injury, damage, or loss. Like anything to do with fear, it is best not to lump everything together into an undifferentiated whole (a blob). Thinking involves distinguishing one thing from another, which is the process of differentiating.
Surely, losing your lollipop is not the same as breaking your arm? This would be answered with an "of course not, do I look that stupid to you?"
Well, yes, sort of. Most people don't differentiate between some very different things and hold them as the same in how they respond to them.
A "wise" person can let go of all of his wealth, lose a significant relationship (probably with some sadness), and lose the function of his limbs and still not feel ungrateful or unhappy. The reason is that the wise person can see that those are insignificant relative to the fact that he can still have everything that is really important, which is the ability to create happiness no matter what the circumstances.
This is an essential point in wisdom, so you should get clear on it. Read Gaps In Life, Always Present, But OK! (try differentiating by giving things an impact rating). Read Undesired Outcomes, OK Or Not?, to differentiate between false fears and fearlessness.
THE COSTLY MISTAKES ARE...AND THE REST IS...
The costly mistakes, or results of mistakes, are:
Stupidly risking death
Stupidly risking all of one's finances
Starving (failing to feed oneself, failing to get food)
Living without adequate shelter
Creating excess stress and loss of peace of mind by not practicing what is necessary.
But, you say, what about having no friends and no support and no partner and having people look down on me, those are big risks to me!
You can't lose something that is an illusion or something strictly created in the mind.
definition of lose, lose what?
"To be unsuccessful in retaining possession of".
So, the definition of lose really is "to give up a gain achieved in the past" (otherwise how could it have come into your possession, as stated above?).
Before, you didn't have that thing you lost, and you survived and lived. So why is that a problem if you've simply gone back to where you were before?
It isn't a problem, as you can live without all of those and/or recreate some of them if you wish.
Still the center, everything that really matters is retained. The rest is a "so what" or a small thing, as in "Don't Sweat The Small Stuff, And It's All Small Stuff!"
Again, review Bad Past, Good Life, where people have had a potential reason to suffer but in fact have been able to realize a good life without many of the things they thought it would be a tragedy to lose, including the loss of the use of limbs.
THE RISK IS IN ...
The true risk is in losing something really big, not in losing the little things that will fall through the cracks because you've not limited yourself to what you already know - and dealing with the unfamiliar, because you're giving up repeating the past in your future.
The really big thing that we don't want to lose is "living as full, as rich, and as happy a life as we can". Sticking with where we are and what we know causes us to not create - to not create a fuller, richer, happier life.
IT IS TRULY "JUST A GAME"
It truly is a game, no matter how real you believe your projections of future suffering to be. Your projections are just constructs of your mind - and the biggest error in life is to believe that those are reality, that those are fixed, permanent, true. (The Buddha suggests that considering things to be permanent is one of the perceptual errors, which together with "attachment" to something as if it is life or death or really important, constitutes mankind creating unnecessary suffering.
NOW IT IS NECESSARY TO CREATE THE FUTURE
What the above discussion was about was having you realize that it is an illusion to believe that we have to constantly or frequently be protecting ourselves, predicting possible doom and gloom without being able to recover, etc. We can give up the past, for something infinitely better and definitely workable: living into a beautiful, compelling future.
Create it in your mind and paper (so you can review it and reclarify it) - and then figure out ways to go toward it, accepting losses and adding victories and richness and fully experiencing life.
In creating a future we would use the process of creation of ideas by asking questions, which calls on our mind to do what it does best: create answers.
We would ask, for instance: (write down the answers!)
What special gift do I have that I can make a difference, touching others in a special way? What is my vision for the quality of my life? What would be a compelling future for me to live into? (One that is not based on fixing yourself or avoiding loss; please don't state your goals in terms of getting rid of a negative; instead go for whatever the positive is that you want.)
What will I never again settle for, being less than I can be, what will I never again accept in my life?
What would have me wake up every morning feeling excited, energized, powerful, happy to have another day? (Go ahead and make up something fictional; notice that you create lots of fictional "bads", so surely it would be better, more fun, and ok to create a fictional "good" things.)
How can I make this future bigger in my mind so that I will always see it and have it prevail over other smaller things??? [Use a Reminder Notebook, framed written plans, or some reminder system to bring you back to it, plus have a supportive group with which you share your aspirations!!!]
What can I concentrae my power into, rather than scatter myself and try to do everything or be a dabbler and jack of all trades and a master of none?
How can I create a passionate, happy, grateful life? What would that look like?
Write down those answers. Also, use the planning packets, especially The Dreambook - Dreams, Desires, Aspirations And Things I Care About and The Ultimate Packet For Finding My Mission/ Purpose/Usefulness (and review the main page for My Purpose, My Mission, My Calling).
TONY ROBBINS' TEN DAY MENTAL CHALLENGE
Though there are many versions of this, I like this one, from his book Awaken The Giant Within, which has been around for awhile but which I heartily recommend:
"For the next ten days, beginning immediately, commit to taking full control of all your mental and emotional faculties by deciding right now that you will not indulge in or dwell on any unresourceful thoughts or emotions for ten consecutive days."
And during those days, spend lots and lots of time constructing a compelling future. The 6 CD set that is worth getting is Live With Passion! Strategies For Creating A Compelling Future ($26.37 on Amazon at the time of this writing). Don't get "Get The Edge", but do consider getting what I consider to be the best audio cassette set of all time: Anthony Robbins' (30 day) Personal Power II, Classic Edition ($25 to $60, have to use a cassette player!) or in the CD version from TonyRobbins.com at $299 (EBay had some at around $30-40).
