LOVE MAKING
HONORING IT AND HAVING IT BE FULLY FULFILLING
CONTENTS
CREATING HAVING NO BARRIERS - How to see and overcome all the barriers, and have a much closer relationship.
BEING A SKILLED LOVER - AND WHY - Trial and error works, but is nowhere near as effective as actually knowing!
RESOURCES RELATED TO MAKING LOVE - Books, videos
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INTRODUCTION
Be sure to review, below, the resources related to making love!!!! Buy the essential ones, as part of learning the essentials of relationships and not being an unskilled or less skilled or less willing lover. Consider reading at least Tracey Cox's book "Hot Sex".
Consider whether when you committed to your relationship whether you also implicitly committed to fulfilling your partner in love making. As it is so vital, I would hope that you did. If not, now is the time.
And be clear, please, that lovemaking is not "performing", as there are no special skills needed beyond the basics of being caring and paying attention to what your partner wants. (Most of us at one time or another have bought into the idealization of being a lover of epic skills and body parts - and we want to "measure up" so that we can attain the approval and acceptance from our partner. But those who still hold these cultural myths as truths are doing themselves and their partners a great disservice. It is more about caringly touching and communicating with one's partner, in ways that are easily learned and done.)
Some people may "take offense" at the suggestion that one should learn more about making love because they have "already learned it, of course!" But few do, as the learning is by guessing and trial and error, but without full knowledge in one of the most key skills, which are totally learnable "soft" skills.
Now on to the materials. And a bit of enjoyment and fulfillment!
THE MEANINGFULNESS OF LOVE MAKING
"Sex", What Is It Really? - There is much misunderstanding that is so harmful here. People see this in such a narrow sense and they completely miss the key point. It is a tragedy to not fully comprehend this. See the parts on what sex really is, deep down, to a man and what it is, beyond the physical, for a woman.
Read the relevant section in Dr. Laura Schlessinger's book, The Proper Care
and Feeding Of Husbands - and follow it! Read also how to understand
, Kevin Leman, which gets more explicit.
Why Have Sex? It's More Than Sex!!! - Understand this, as it is a basis for creating and
maintaining a foundation for a marriage.
What Making Love Means To A Man - Understand this to remove the barriers, create
compassion, and to be able to truly love a man, in action!
REQUESTING WHAT YOU WANT
(F) Love-Making - What Is Wanted And Preferred - Few people ever adequately
express this, so they are less likely to get what they want - in terms of what and
how. (Explicit)
CREATING HAVING NO BARRIERS
Making Love - The Barriers We Set Up And Why - Lots of reasons and things we
create, but they are mostly childish, from limited belief systems and incredible
assumptions and misinterpretations.
Sex? What If I'm Not In The Mood? - It is crucial that you understand this, as it is
one of the biggest and most unintelligent of barriers.
When The Desire Is Not There At The Time - What do you do? This is how to make it all
work.
BEING A SKILLED LOVER - AND WHY
How Skilled At Making Love Should I Be? - Well, how important a part of life is it?
If it's important, how do I go about being an expert, instead of an amateur or trial
and error person?
RESOURCES RELATED TO MAKING LOVE:
Books
Read at least one of these. Actually it is most important that you do make love, even if it is imperfect, as long as it is very caring; that is what meets the basic need, as high performance is not and should not be that important!
It is recommended that you read two books as this is such a vital area! Being a good lover is not what you may think from the myths and the movies!)
See also the books below on understanding the opposite gender, as the knowledge therein is essential to relating well, which in turn is the basis for feeling like making love, which is, in turn key to relating well...
IGNORANCE IN THIS AREA HAS A HUGE EFFECT!
AND MOST PEOPLE THINK THEY KNOW FAR MORE THAN THEY ACTUALLY KNOW!
A1 Hot Sex, Tracey Cox - Alternates between the male and female, with points of views and
techniques.
A He Comes Next, The Thinking Woman's Guide To Pleasuring A Man, Ian Kerner, Ph.D. -
What he really wants may be different than you think or do. Learn what really works and
will keep him in camp, literally and fantasy-wise.
A *How To Be A Great Lover, Totally Explcit Techniques Every Woman Wants Her Man To
Know, Lou Paget
A How To Give Her Absolute Pleasure, Lou Paget
A She Comes First, The Thinking Man's Guide To Pleasuring A Woman, Ian Kerner, Ph.D. -
It would be very difficult to not get the point!
The Ultimate Guide To C---l----s...Exquisite Pleasure, Violet Blue - Guys - Develop this
skill. It's only fair!
The Ultimate Guide To Fe-----o, How To G- D--- ... A Man And Give Him ,,,Pleasure, Violet
Blue - Women will find this will produce ample goodwill and cooperation plus giving.
Size Matters, The Hard Facts About Male Sexuality That Every Woman Should Know,
Harry Fisch, M.D. and Kara Baskins
Tickle His Pickle, Sadie Allison - Thorough and entertaining. A very useful skill.
See also:
OTHER BOOKS - These books have a good chapter or section that puts lovemaking in
perspective - everyone should know and honor these.
The Proper Care And Feeding Of Husbands, Dr. Laura Schlessinger.
IF OVER 40 OR 50:
Sex Over 40, Saul H. Rosenthal, M.D.
VIDEO
DVDs: The various videos/DVDs at www.bettersex.com. Buy a few, as this are of excellent
teaching quality.
See overall contents/links page in navigation bar below, but also see Love, Loving, And Being Loved Contents/Links.
RESOURCES
Use the resources at the end; read some books!
