FIRST, LEARN ABOUT BELIEFS
THEN CORRECT THEM AS RAPIDLY AS POSSIBLE,
FOR THEY ARE YOUR LIFE
CONTENTS
First priority, as beliefs determine the quality of our lives
Learning about beliefs
Links for further learning across areas:
Esteem/confidence
Fear/Anxiety/Worry
Psychology Overall
Managing The Mind
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(This piece follows (continues) after reading: Perspective/Discussion About Beliefs.)
FIRST PRIORITY: BELIEFS DETERMINE THE QUALITY OF OUR LIVES
The quality of our beliefs determine the quality of our lives, in addition to our progress in, our peace of mind, and our experience of life. Becoming an expert in this area, as part of the Happiness skills, is imperative. Note also that developing the Gratitude viewpoint goes hand in hand with this part.
LEARNING ABOUT BELIEFS
Learning about this vital, vital link to living a happy life will be relatively easy and very, very productive.
Understanding beliefs and seeing which ones cause various results in life helps put you "at choice" about which ones to keep and which ones to change.
Beliefs (and thoughts that aren't beliefs) are highly related to the "sentences" we have in our Internal Conversations, so you'll want to read the key parts of that section.
After my 5 week summer sequence at Option, I wrote the following piece about how and why my experience of beliefs, shoulds, and fears was "transformed":
Briefly peruse the format you can use for changing beliefs in The Option Method Dialogue With Yourself: The Core Questions. The basics for this were provided through Lenora Boyle (www.changelimitingbeliefs.com) a practitioner of the highly acclaimed Option Method. This is a "prompter" for the questions. Original originator was Bruce Di Marsico.
In the self-esteem section excerpts below, you'll learn how false standards, control, and judgment affect beliefs.
In the Fear Anxiety section, you'll wanted to discern between real and false threats in Threats And Fear. Most fear is based on erroneous beliefs. Change the beliefs and you eliminate the fear!
In the Psychology excerpts herein you'll want to especially read about judging and criticizing oneself, plus the piece about discriminating between truth and not-truth, which many people don't do! This piece is central to all psychology and to some false beliefs most people have: No-Blame - The Reasoning For
The next section to read is Brain patterns, so that you can see how beliefs work mechanically and what to do about them. (After that, you'll continue on to read Change/Deal With Beliefs - The Process and then select beliefs of interest from Key Individual Beliefs, One By One .)
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READ THESE FOR FURTHER LEARNING "ACROSS THE AREAS"
Either scan these for interest and then read them or follow the "Changing/Dealing With/Managing Your Beliefs". Then you'll go on to the Key Individual Beliefs, One By One, where you can look at each one at a time and convert them to what is true and helpful.
ABOUT BELIEFS (See for an overview: Schema For The Experience Of Life.)
Understanding beliefs and seeing which ones cause various results in life helps put you "at choice" about which ones to keep and which ones to change.
The Anatomy Of Negative Belief Structures - This is a diagram picture. It is vital that one understand the basis of belief structures. Link into enlightenedpartners.com, resources, and click on that title under "resources". Also, you might wish to use the CURE Worksheet.
Faith - What is it, how appropriate is it in some cases, and how to have it.
No-Blame - The Reasoning For - Buy into this central concept and your criticism of yourself will diminish (along with numerous disempowering beliefs) and the criticism of others may disappear all together (mine has, as it dissolves any such thought virtually instantly.
Brain Patterns - Help you to understand how "stupid" most of your thoughts are.
Change/Deal With Beliefs - The Process - Put together what you know about belief and implement the change process, which is very doable and very, very worthwhile!
Key Individual Beliefs, One By One - Clarifying each as to whether they are true, how they could be converted to something more beneficial. Build a new belief structure one by one, while deleting those that don't work.
FROM THE SELF-ESTEEM/SELF-CONFIDENCE section, but really about "straight thinking. Many people act confident or are actually confident but many fail to realize that changing thinking in these ways can make a huge difference - we call it "straight thinking" and getting in touch with the realities of human behavior. Some pieces of interest are :
As A Powerful Person I... (See also Life Management, Creating A Whole New Person and The Powerful Person) - In order to create something, one first has to see clearly what it is, including all the details.
The Confident Person - A Questionnaire - Here, again, we must see clearly how this person thinks and
acts. Rate yourself on these and then raise the level of where you are.
Comparing And Other False Standards - Once you know the "false premise" this cause of unhappiness is eliminated.
Handling Being Judged By Others - False fear around this is one of the greatest sources of unhappiness.
Knowing What I Can And Can't Control - Not knowing this leads to unnecessary frustration, waste of energy, and often some false conclusions about oneself. Consider reading some of the linked pages.
Choosing What To Control And Not Control - One of the key psychological concepts is having a clear
"locus of control", for if you're not clear you'll suffer from trying to control the wrong things.
(F) List of What Can And Can't Control - Knowing what you can and can't control is a key to accepting life
as it is, directing your energy where it works, and to having a sense of control that helps one be
more certain.
Clear Disclaimers of What Is Absolutely Not True - One must sort out and then be clear about what is "not true", as it helps to be more certain as to what is true - and you stop wondering about what is true.
Self Esteem Affirmations - Ignore the BS ones and use the truly grounded ones that are truly worth "firming" up.
Where Are You On The Victim Versus Cause Scale? - You cannot afford to be even partially toward the "wrong" side. Many people don't see that the are operating in some areas as a victim, as they think they are strong - they need to realize what is causing some of their unhappiness.
FROM THE FEAR, ANXIETY, WORRY section, as most of our beliefs originally derive from fear and the misunderstanding of what there is to lose - or not lose! There is much to learn in this section, so you might wish to scan and pick pieces to read, using the Emotion And Fear Management Contents/Links page. Some pieces to, perhaps, read first.
Threats And Fear - We misperceive what is a threat - and then we are off and running in our fears and the fear flight/fight response - hugely wasting our resources, damaging our bodies, and wasting our lives.
What I Have, For Sure - Part of the basis for realizing we have exaggerated fears of loss, when there is truly no need to have any fear. This is an essential understanding to all of life.
FROM THE DEVELOPMENT AND MANAGEMENT OF THE MIND - Read also the "Related" pieces, in the box to the right. Some items of possible interest:
Protecting The Mind From The Negative - It's an essential "skill" - and it's very doable (mechanical!) , with not very much work to get to a good level.
The Parts That Come Together To Manage The Mind - These are the pieces that contribute to full mind management.
My Utility "Coping" Thoughts - These are thoughts that generalize about life which are brought into mind readily and frequently when things happen. They can be disempowering (identify yours) or empowering. Examples are provided to choose from or jump off of. An essential to a happy life - used by the happiest people in the world (Why Are Buddhist Monks So Happy?)
See also the page: Empowerment/Affirmations.
FROM PSYCHOLOGY OVERALL, Key Readings and Individual Pieces, some selected below: (Go as deeply as you wish, by selecting the pieces that are of interest to you from the various level of contents/links pages, The top level links into the other areas: Psychology Contents/Links.)
Excerpts from the BASIC LEARNING MODULE:
The Eternal Internal Triangle - An Empowering Model - Use this model to understand all the basic overview in psychology and in relationships. This should clear up which part of you needs to be in charge and it will add insights that will help you see how certain practices and ways of viewing things will
enhance your life tremendously.
The Judge/Critic - This is a great deal of the basis for psychology. Learn to handle this and your relationship with yourself and others will dramatically improve.
(See also the pieces of interest in Contents/Links Fault, Blame, Right/Wrong, Good/Bad, Criticism, Anger, Punishment Syndrome - We learned this culturally but it is not logical, reasonable, or supported by facts, nor does it work to get us what we want!!!!
How To Reconstruct Your Mindset For Greater Happiness - Re-forming certain viewpoints and ways of thinking can literally transform your ability to be happy.
Sentences - Processing Into Empowering Statements - Your "internal" (and external) conversation can be converted from disempowering or ordinary to being very empowering and strong.
Read the pieces that are capitalized, below. Also, you might read the asterisked ones.
INDIVIDUAL PIECES ON PSYCHOLOGY (Read per interest, see above for key pieces for everyone to read. Read especially those title that are capitalized. )
The Reasoning For No-Blame, No-Criticism - The essential foundational piece to free yourself up from the nonsense.
Acceptance - The need for it and the way to it. (One question is where to get it from.)
*CHILDHOOD DECISIONS AND TOOLS - Are you still operating from them?
COMPASSION AND THE HUMAN CONDITION - A LOOK AT YOURSELF - See what compassion really is, rating yourself as you go. Most people don't know what compassion really is!
Immature Emotions - Shame, Guilt, Self-Pity... How we misuse them! Find out what they are and how to stop having them use you!
KEY THOUGHTS AND BEHAVIORS TO CHOOSE TO ATTAIN PERSONAL HAPPINESS AND PEACE - STAGE I - A 15 page "book" that will help you drop certain thinking and change behaviors such that you can maintain personal happiness and peace. Worth more than a few minutes of your time.
PERSONAS AND ROLES - Which Are Dominant For You? And which don't serve you?
THE PINK ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM - HAVING IT DICTATE OUR LIVES - There are beliefs, rules and other "things" in our lives we don't "see" anymore, yet we are "adjusting" to them and wasting much of our lives.
Responsibility Vs. Non-Responsibility - Where Are You? (Self-rating)
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LATER, WHEN READY, READ THESE EXCERPTS FROM OTHER SECTIONS:
You can link below to key beliefs that are extracted on the following topics, whenever you're ready to go deeper:
Esteem/confidence Excerpt, below - Entirely based on beliefs
Fear/Anxiety/Worry Excerpt, below - Totally fueled by beliefs, so if you experience these read the
relevant sections. This includes low frustration tolerance, irritability, impatience, etc.
Psychology Overall Excerpts, below - Ones "mental constructs" (such as beliefs and philosophy)
determine your entire psychology
Managing The Mind Excerpts, below - You can change the level of reaction to negative beliefs, but
first you should also learn how the mind works.
Victimhood - The primary underlying cause behind much fear and unhappiness. Study it and you'll dump childhood beliefs much quicker!
Select and watch the free Webinars at Option.
RELEVANT READINGS
Esteem/confidence
Fear/Anxiety/Worry
Psychology Overall
Managing The Mind
Directory:
Key Videos:
Resources
HOW TO READ A SECTION
Read a section straight through without diverting, as it tends to create confusion.
Then go back through the text and read the relevant links that you want to.
